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Movie Ratings Nonsense
By Danny Carlton
A long time ago we had four easy to understand ratings for movies. Now, I'm told that at one time there were no ratings at all, but the movie companies started getting a bit racy. Congress started inquiries into imposing a rating system, but before they could, the movie industry quickly popped up with one of their own. They grinned at Congress and said, "Don't worry we've taken care of the problem." In spite of it's general desire to create more and more laws, Congress shelved their ratings law, and considered the problem solved. So, contrary to what most people have always assumed, the ratings system isn't law. But at least we understood it. Note I used the past tense.
G was for kids or the whole family. PG was for grownups. R was also for grownups, but contained nastier stuff. X was for perverts. That was easy to understand. But during the mid-seventies and earlier eighties, a lot of parents started sending their kids to PG as well as R movies. If a kid showed up to a R movie without a grown-up, the ticket guy would ask, "Do you're parents know you're here?" The kid would say, "sure." (and of course all 10 year-olds going to see Phantasm or Porky's would always tell the truth, right?) and they'd be let in. So the perception changed. G became kiddie movies. PG became action movies. R became horror or teen sex movies, and of course X was still for perverts. But by the mid-eighties parents got confused. See since G meant kids, few movie companies by that time wanted to be cursed with a G rating, so they'd either add some innocuous something to get that coveted PG rating, or simply just out and ask for it. So the "family movie" of the early seventies had vanished to be replaced by a scant few kid and a whole lot of PG of unknown content. The two that kicked up the most fuss were Gremlins and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Both rated PG, but both definitely not for little kids. Shocked parent raised a fuss after their little ones had nightmares about little toothy demon-looking things blowing up in microwaves or about some evil looking sweaty guy in a turban pulling their heart out of their chests. So the movie industry obliged us with PG-13.
During the following years G virtually disappeared as PG became the new "family movie" rating. That was a problem for us who think that foul language isn't what we want our kids to listen to. But since we were the minority, our opinion didn't matter. A few years later Hollywood tried to foist the infamous NC-17 which I guess meant "rated R, no really
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